HAS ANYONE EVER EXPERIENCED NOT BEING APPRECIATED

This is not a fiction neither is it a movie. No matter whom you are, at some point, your sexual libido will rise and you will be in search of a man or woman to satisfy your libido. One of the challenges I faced while in search of a companion is because most times people judge based on their own beliefs forgetting that human beings are similar but always have a succinct difference in their personality. This leads me to share the story of my adversary while growing up though I was from a wealthy home. I was so concerned about my career than having a man.
                             
My name is Olabimpe Ajewole. I stay at Adeniran Ogunsanya street here in Surulere, I am the third child in the family of 7, {3 boys, 2 girls and parents}. I was born with what people term as silver ‘spoon’. I always got all I crave for; I have never
felt discomfort whatsoever while growing up as a child. I went to one of the best schools; I wore expensive clothes and jewelry. I had never boarded commercial buses before; our driver drives me to wherever I went to. I completed my secondary school education at the age of 16, that same year I got into the university, and at age 21 I had graduated and rounded up my NYSC. On getting home my parents had secured a job for me, I started working and receiving a huge amount of money as salary. Everything was going smoothly that I had no negative or bad experience. At that time I always see people that are of low class as very poor people that God has forsaken, I thought things weren’t going on well for them because they were uneducated and lazy; I detest them so much whenever I meet people like that in my university days. So I only relate with people of my class until one day that I got back from work, it was on a Friday, I had a fabulous day at work that when I got home I jumped on the sofa, turned on the TV and tuned to a channel randomly.

The movie was about a relationship, the couples were making love, it was then I felt a sweet sensation. For the first time, I realized no man has ever wooed or proposed to me. No guy has ever called my attention for a relationship despite how beautiful I was, this sounds weird, right? YES really I have never been with a guy, I have never been jilted nor heartbroken because I have never dated a guy before. Is it that I am not attractive? Or am not worth a woman a man can date? At age 26 I pondered! I remembered that day that I jumped up, headed to my car garage and drove off to my parent. On getting there, I threw a question to my mother saying thus; Mum, didn’t you notice that I have never bought a man to the house before? It’s not because I was shy too, it’s simply because no man has ever walked up to me. Mum don’t I look beautiful enough? Despite my glittering skin and endowed body, no man has appreciated me before but my sister is happily married, why is my own so bad? I cried out that day. It was that day my parents told me they have been praying about it and it was one of the reasons they advised me to get an apartment of my own maybe suitors can come when they don’t see me living with my parent. Mum told me that has been an issue between her and dad, in other words, they have noticed earlier before I did.
                                                                     

I have tagged “a girl with the issue in the family”. I was too busy pursuing my career that I have forgotten that I had a big problem. I call it problem because even though it’s good to be a working-class lady, you can only be complete when outsiders commend you, be it negative or positive, people do say “whosoever they don’t talk about is as good as dead” that means I was a living dead if I can be that way and no man has ever commended my beauty even if it’s a decent, I didn’t get any commendation. The moment I noticed that it drew me closer to God more, I prayed like I had never prayed before. I went for seminars, I attended every open program, I stopped driving my car to the office and on the street, I started going out in commercial buses, for no reason I will just stop by at a joint to see if anyone will be willing to interact with me. I go to retail shops to get stuff and just create one unnecessary discussion just to see if any guy would look my way or notice me, all to no avail, no man looked or interfered in my talk even though there are men around. In fact, I went to see a doctor to check if there is a disease that is so obvious in my body that could be making men run away from me, a disease that is a “chaser of men”. Doctors will just look at me and laugh like I was joking or crazy because my predicament sounds weird to them. Nobody had the solution to a 30 years old lady who has never been wooed by a man let alone having sex. Several times I cried like my eyes were going to fall off, I prayed for death, In most cases, I attempted murder but somehow one person (from my family) will be around to rescue me.

 I was no longer dedicated to my job, things fell apart for me, my career was on the verge of destruction when I was walking on the street and I saw a poster of a church holding a crusade that evening. After the crusade, I meditated on the word of God severally, I prayed ceaselessly. At that time I had change my view about people who I term “low class”, I realized some people aren’t that poor as I thought, some are actually wealthier than I am but they maintained a low key, some who are actually poor are ambitious, hardworking, loyal and loving people. My pride fell drastically when I started relating with people on the street. I stopped wearing some clothes because I felt they appear too expensive and that might be one of the reasons why men don’t approach me. Little did I know that all of these was only to make me understand that when God blesses one than the other, it’s not because the other doesn’t deserve it but because God has his own time to accomplish or attend to everybody. We should appreciate and love each other (whether poor or rich) even as God loves us. Never hate on anyone or belittle them. No one knows tomorrow.

At the end friends, on the long run, I met a guy in the bus on my way home from work, he was sitting close to me, he whispered into my ears “I LOVE YOU”! I was in total dismay but within me, I was filled with joy, I didn’t even observe the person that said it, I was just happy as that was the first time I was going to hear that from a man. I was shivering and wondering where the whole “I LOVE YOU” will lead to. Eventually, we both alighted at the same stop, I didn’t want to move too fast because I wanted him to engage me in a discussion he has started in the bus, my prayers were answered, he begged for few minutes to speak with me, who am I not to grant him my attention? This man was cute, very handsome; he has exactly what I want in a man physically. We started talking and he told me how much he appreciated my beauty, he said I was the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. I didn’t know when tears fell from my eyes, he was surprised and started feeling sorry for me, he was begging seriously to be forgiven if he has said something bad, I quickly controlled my self, we exchanged contact that day and hence, we became friends, after him I started receiving series of messages from MEN who wants to marry me as though it has been piled up for a long time and waiting to be sent and received, where were these MEN when I was crying for the past 15years that I have been crying for a man? Dear friends after 6months (I was already 41) Wale (the guy I met in the bus) proposed to me, Of course, I said YES. Wale is a loving man, very understanding, loyal and God fearing.

I am happily married now with three (3) loving kids (2boys and 1girl). And, we (my husband and I) are wealthier than I was before. Indeed only God can change every situation around. It is not how far but how well. Thank you #Charlian Tv for giving me a platform on #PEOPLEAREOUNDLAGOS to share this. Thank you all.

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